Dear Twenty-Something 

Dear Twenty-Something,

Whew. This decade is something, isn’t it? One minute you feel like you’re on top of the world, full of dreams, plans and potential. The next, you’re lying in bed wondering if you’re the only one who still doesn’t have it all figured out. You’re expected to chase your dreams, find your voice, build a career, fall in love, stay fit, stay kind, stay relevant, keep a prayer life, have deep friendships, call your family, manage your finances, protect your mental health, and somehow still thrive. It’s like the world handed you a never-ending checklist and said, “Here. Perform.” You’ll see people getting married, launching businesses, graduating, relocating, having babies or buying houses. And you’ll wonder, What am I even doing with my life?

Comparison is a thief of joy, especially in your twenties. Your dream job may still feel out of reach. Your gift may feel overlooked. Your healing may be taking longer than expected. The person you thought you’d marry may walk away. And your “calling” may feel like a mystery you haven’t unlocked yet. The focus should be on becoming someone God can trust. Becoming whole, steady, wise, joyful, disciplined and grounded for the opportunities and blessings He’ll put in your care.

You’re just starting out at life, at work, at family life, at forming more purposeful relationships, at most of what you’re doing in this phase so you will make mistakes. Let’s just get that out of the way. You may say yes to things you should’ve said no to. You may stay longer than you should in some places. You may mess up opportunities, misplace trust and even get your heart broken. But hey, don’t drown in shame. Let the mistakes teach you, not define you.

As a woman in her twenties, one of the most defining life’s decisions you’ll probably make is choosing a life partner. You’re going to meet people who feel like home but were only meant to be a temporary stop. Not every connection is a covenant. Some people will love you for who they think you are, but not for who you’re becoming. Let them go. It’ll hurt, but it won’t kill you. Actually, it’ll free you. Wait for the kind of love that brings peace, not confusion, even if it doesn’t come in your twenties. Let it be one that affirms your purpose and honors your boundaries, not tests them. And while you wait, build, travel, heal, laugh, learn, make room for relationships that are safe and mutual. And be that kind of friend too.

The world will always adjust but you’ll never have your twenties back so give yourself permission to grow as slow or as fast as you can, to fail forward, to ask for help, to rest. Your life’s puzzle may not fit in the moment but the dots will align in hindsight. Day by day, prayer by prayer, choice by choice, piece by piece, you’ll wake up one day and find yourself living in answered prayers so long as you’re in sync with God.

Some Anchors for Your Twenties:

• Keep a journal, not just for memories, but for milestones and those answered prayers.
• Read Proverbs often. It’ll grow your discernment.
• Don’t ignore red flags in friendships, work, or love.
• Learn to steward your money early. Budgeting is spiritual.
• Seek mentors. Be around people who live the kind of life you admire, not just online, but in real life.
• Learn how to apologize properly. And forgive even better.
• Say “no” without explaining yourself. Boundaries are biblical.
• Take breaks from social media when it starts to shape your identity more than your intimacy with God.
• Stay curious. Ask questions. Read books. Learn new skills. This is your training ground.
• When in doubt, pray. You won’t always have the perfect plan but you can have peace knowing Who walks with you.

In all, may you find peace and clarity in God’s Word. May He guard your heart from comparison, heal what still hurts and renew your mind when self-doubt creeps in. May you grow in wisdom, discernment and confidence in the future that God has called you to. When life presents you with temptations, may your character be strong enough to say No even when no one is watching. And may you always be reminded of the magnitude of your destiny that you refuse to settle or become a shadow of yourself.

With love,
Women of Purple